I think Dad has finally snapped

Creating a new charge in order for him to get more money is just the tip of the ice burg I believe. Along with our photographic mother, our father is slipping into the depths of insanity. This is all great news for us though, because by the time that 'condo' fund has grown enough to purchase a condo, dad will be long gone and we will be reeping the benefits of a large insurance policy. So I say- don't write because the more we stress him out from the lack of knowledge the sooner he goes. We have to stick together family- can we do this? Yes! We can! The 'Big Kahuna' must be stopped. His ideas for making money need to be harnessed before we are forced to admit him to 'the home'. Suggestions are accepted, but drastic measures need to be enforced soon.

Surcharge

Recently, the number of participants posting blogs and commenting on the posts has decreased significanlty. Excuses for not participating seem to be a results of mixed up priorities. In an effort to help us as a family reprioritize for things of eternal value, I am imposing the following edict.

There will be a $5 weekly surcharge for those failing to post at least 100 words/week. (Yes, that means you Melinda and Jose). Proceeds will go to the C&C (Chris and Charlotte) retirement condo fund. Checks should be written to recently formed entity, Biggiver LLC with C&CRCF written on the memo line.

Thank you in advance for your cooperation.

Your humble and grateful father.

Fire Update

The fire alarm goes off in our house frequently--usually monthly. We have to change batteries often--which is good.

The latest fire happened last night. I was cooking french fries in hot oil. I put too many fries in and the oil started to boil over. Not good. I turned the burner off, removed most of the fries and pulled the pot off to the side. Mom ran to get some paper towels to soak up the oil. Good. The oil was soaking up in the paper towels and things were under control. I asked Mom to turn on the burner on the other side of the stove away from the oil and paper towels so I could continue cooking while she finished up soaking up the oil. Well . . .. . . . .. . . . .. . . . . . Mom turned on the burner where the paper was and poof! The stove burst into flames. Her first reaction was to go get the camera?????!!!!!!!!!! to take a picture.

There was smoke. Fire alarms went off. I was able to scrape the oil-soaked burning paper towels onto an old cookie sheet. They continued to burn. Mom picked up the cookie sheet bare-handed and headed outside. The fire burned her hands and arms (slightly-just enough so she threw the cookie sheet down. Fortunately it landed on the counter.) She then got a hot pad and carried it out onto the patio. THEN SHE WENT AND GOT THE CAMERA! You'll all get to see the photos. I'll make sure she sends them. In the meantime, the children and I opened up the windows and tried to get the fire alarms to stop shrieking.

I love when mother helps me cook. I guess I don't have anyone else to blame but myself. What happened one week after we were married in our small Dallas apartment at 5AM when she burned the bacon in the oven should have been enough of a warning so I could have annulled the marriage at that point. But, noooooo. I thought it was just a fluke. I mean after all, she is a Home Ec Major. She's an expert chef.

I guess my singed hair and eyebrows are going to be permanent. Do you suppose those can be restored in the resurrection with something that's not flammable? Note to self. Include that in future prayers. My second wife in the celestial kingdom will be a trained professional fire fighter. Sorry Mel.

The RM!!

i have made an important descion down here....i am NEVER going to be know as "an RM" or "THE RM"! so heres the prologue to this descion.....i was at AP and got a phone call from a guy named Mike and he needed a ride to go volunteer at DI so i told him i would puck him up and when i arrived at his house i was shocked and amazed! he looked like Richard Hair TO THE "T" except more......more....uh structured if that makes since. BUT anyway on our way there we were just talking and he showed me his planner and you know he had times to wake up and do his HW and all but the kicker is he had set-a-side a time to EMAIL! ha it was like a 15 min time slot and he told me that yesterday he wanted to email but couldn't bc it wasnt on his schedule! SO ne way we get going and there was a guy that pulled RIGHT in front of me and SLAMMED on his breaks and i almost hit him so i said man that guys smart..and the RM said you know what we cant judge him, we dont kno his situation, we dont know what his life is like... i didnt know what to say so i figured silence was the best answer. then at DI we were talkin and he said yeah i dont listen to the radio much i dont like the filth that is on it! and i agreed and then he said yeah i just put the kinda music on cds and just listen to those, i asked what cds he had, and he replied well i only have 4 and they are.........................the new testament, old testament, D&C, and a MIX of MOTAB! wow and he also asked me on the way up if i had read the autobiography on Parley P Pratt and i sorrowfully said no i havent YET!! ok now heres my favorite one on the way home he told me hes working out and stuff and i told him bc at AP they warned us about SOME of the protein shakes have fillers that dont enhance the body at all they dont do ANYTHING but SOME CAN make u test positive on a drug test and he got silent for a little bit and said well in D&C it says that we shouldnt have any addictive drugs or stimulants and OF COURSE thats true but then he got quite a little more and well he said man i think i am going to have to ask my bishop about this. i told him he was fine and didnt need to worry but he insisted that he needed to ask. SO in conclusion i feel SOOOOO SORRY for my sisters now bc they have to look for a young man that is like this IDK how they do it!!

Costa Rica

I have a favor. I would like each of you to write a smalll paragragh or two answering the question: What I remember most about Costa Rica. I finished a photo album and I would like to have a 4x6 card from everyone. You can just write it as a comment on this post and I will type it up. It was so fun to relive our trip as I put it together. I am planning on doing an album for each of you on my computer - Mel and Jeseph taught me how (don't hold your breath).
FYI - Moms next door neighbor (laMon Ashman AKA Monnie- mons- big-tub) has brain cancer. It is different than Dillan Rogers. Part is inoperable, so it doesn't look too good. Marge Glenn (Debbie Osmonds mom) her lung cancer isn't responding to the chemo so she isn't in too good a shape either. Mom is having a hard time loosing her two good friends.
Dad and I talked about bring the whole gang to Utah when the cadet choir comes - February 17-20 Presidents day weekend. We'll see.
I love you all!!
Mom/Users/charlottebrady/Desktop/Photo 166-1.jpg

Ding, Dong, The Warlock's 'bout Dead

As of late, there has been talk and speculation about the amount of life insurance your father has. As a personal witness to the actual contract, I can affirm that it's a bundle.
I'm not going to say how much it is, but let me just say that if something were to happen to him (accidentally) we could have trips to Costa Rica and other vacation destinations much more often. We could even forget his crazy idea of this "Talents" thing he concocted. None of you would have to work for a long, long time.

Now, I'm not going to suggest anything to you, but if someone has an idea that will "speed up the process", I would be open to it.

Love,
Mother

I watched a movie once that showed that if you beat someone to death with oranges, there is no bruising.

I Need To Lose Weight

The last few days I have not been feeling great. An occasional cough, etc. Not really too bad.

Well, on the way home on the airplane I had an open seat next to me in the exit row. Yes! The plane was just about to leave when this very, very large and short 25ish year old girl came down the aisle and told me (in a very, very loud voice) that I was sitting in her seat. Before I could respond, she announced, "That's OK, I'll just sit in your seat here in the middle."

She didn't fit in the seat (her hips prevented her from fitting because her rear only touched the sides of the seat), so she looked like an adult sitting in Annalise's car seat. She was a head taller than me when she was seated. Standing, she was about 5'2". And she spilled over into my personal space. I was more or less pinned against the side of the airplane with my face smashed against the window. She then tried to strike up a conversation while looking down at the books/magazines I was reading and made comments the entire time. I didn't say a word.

When the 30 minute flight finally ended and the plane landed, she immediately got on her cell phone and called all her 'friends' (I honestly don't think her phone even worked) and talked loud so everyone could hear. Finally, she stood up which allowed me to peel myself out of the seat. As I reached down to get my bag, I coughed and sniffled a couple of times. She looked at me and said, "Don't tell me you're sick! I can't believe I even sat by you! Now I"m going to get sick!" Now, the entire plane was looking at us. I wanted to say, but didn't (because of Joseph's example of not saying anything bad about anyone), "I'm sick. You're fat. I'll feel better in the morning You'll still be fat." But I just smiled and got off the plane. Oh the joys of travel!

Don't Mess with Texas

This is everyones recently moved to Utah sister. I am decided to report on the days events because as I look back on them... they were pretty exciting. As you all know Dad, Joseph, Adam Rae and I are all in Austin Texas at a Financal seminar for real estate - aka getting property cheap. 'Twas an interesting day. It all started off last night when dad and Adam tried to come pick us up from the airport... apparently 'we took a few wrong turns'. But don't you worry, we got picked up and we are safe. So we are trying to get something to eat. Melinda- imagine Sweden and Denmark and Brussells all over again. You and Joseph are about the same with it comes to giving directions in a foreign place because we were lost! ANYWAY- like 2 or 3 hours later we get to our apartment after seening what seems to be all of Texas. Dad had a rough night... we'll leave it at that.

So we are supposed to meet the boys at 7:15 for breakfast and guess when we woke up? Yup, 7:17. We only had to turn around once maybe twice on our way to the hotel where the meeting took place. Dad hit the pole when trying to park. Darn pole just jumped out in back of him. We go to the meeting and Dad has been newly christened 'Chris Baker'. After a seemingly rousing day of real estate. I was introduced to Larry the Cable Guy's Home Depot show.

We went to down town Austin to find something for dinner. What a sight it was. Bars and clubs were everywhere! So we decided to go to this random place, mostly because it was recommended and because it didn't have blaring music comming from inside. Adam had a good time with our beautiful hostess, but don't worry Melinda, Joseph made it clear that he was gay. The steak was to die for, but the dessert was what topped everything off. It was called 'Chocolate Seduction'- brownie crust, with chocolate pudding stuff and fudge sauce and strawberries and bits 'o' cheese cake in the middle. YUMMY!!!! After our belts were loosened a bit we were walking back to the car and was entertained with a man walking down the street in a cherry bikini bottom, with the little ties on the side 'n' everything. Bu don't worry, he had a jacket on, so he would have been allowed in any store. So that's day one! I am dead tired but look forward to tomorrow. Happy Birthday to Commodore!

Another one bites the dust!

Sadly enough, another one bites the dust. Last week I let T.J. (trent) go. It wasn't easy but it felt SOOOOO good to get it over with. And there was only a few tears shed on his part. I've never been happier this single before. Some of you may be wondering about Bary, one of the boys that called during the break. Well, we were supposed to go out this last Saturday but he called Saturday morning and said that he and this girl had decided to date steadily. But have no fear - I still went on a date Saturday night with a guy named Nick. We had a total blast and he was super cute, unfortunitely he goes to Weber. I have about 4-5 guys that I'm interested in, but only 2 have showed any interest in me. Thats ok though - 11 months and 2 weeks till my papers go in!

Typical Day

so i decided that all of you are probably REALLY worried about what i am doing and needed to know what i was up to so here we go....brett wakes up at 6 then drives 15 miles which takes him 45 min bc of traffic and well lets just say that i have to repent after every drive bc of what i call ppl AZ DRIVERS ARE NOT GOOD AT ALL!! then i get at AP (i am already learning the lingo!) and order breakfast which is 6 eggs and a blueberry muffin then after i eat all that i go throw it up.........lol jk i go and do liek lifting and plyos till about 945 then i do cardio work for a half hour. then i chill fer about an hour and wait to go work out with chris houser (the soccer coach) and then go home! yahoo!! oh yeah so i weighed in at 153 when i got here and now on monday i was 165 so ITS WORKING! lol oh yeah and why is everyone worried about brett and gurls?? there is no need to worry the only gurls i see are either women that look like men at AP or anges friends....enough said! lol no but steve and i well we struugle with "picking up chicks" we went to the mall and... no luck, went to the movies..... no luck, WENT TO SINGLES WARD and.......no luck! so our last chance is institute which starts on wed so THEN you can start worring (sp?!?) oh and lol steve was like bertt we have to go to the mall and go pick up chicks and i said ok he said lets go and i said ur wearing that? and he was lie what else should i wear? (oh GREAT) lol so brett was liek steve lemme show u the ways and lol well lets just say that he got the best "response" that he has ever gotten lol so today we are going (we being me and him) the mall to go buy him some different clothes lol so i was very proud of myself! lol oh and the movie GLORY ROAD is WAY!!! good!!!! so..............ummmmmmmmm yeah thats the update!

I have found my one and only weakness!

Mother, Father-
It's true, your one and only perfect daughter has a weakness. It's called 2 party sisters! There is no school today and I have to admit that it might be a little difficult to get any work done. I woke up (at 10:-) with full intentions of getting started right away with listening to the sultry sound of my fathers voice, but then my phone rang with Melinda on the ID.... breakfast at her house! PARTY- mother, I am just doing what you told me to do, but I am suffering because of it. Then tonight there is FHE and I am cutting Jordans hair and working out and I went out on a date and Afton told boys to ask me out on dates... so little time, so little Stephanie... what's a girl to do?

Preventive Medicine

Hear ye! Hear ye! Be it know throughout all Bradyland that from heretoforth, any visitors/guest to the Brady Castle bearing romantic intent must provide medical documents affirming health. A specific, doctor documented and signed, medical/dental health history must be completely filled out including all current and past medications taken (whether natural or man-made approved by the FDA or not) along with any and all medical/dental conditions diagnosed by any health care provider anywhere, anytime. Proof should be provided the King of Bradyland that all conditions and diagnosed ailments have been properly treated and under proper medical supervision. Proof of medical insurance must also be provided in the form of a certified letter with current date by the insurance provider. Government issued IT with photo must be provided. Anyone caught trying to forge documents or falsify information will be immediatel dismissed with no regard to future food or housing considerations.

King, Queen and all children, friends, associates, pets, etc. are held harmless in the unlikely event that something bad happens. Additionally, said guests must be willing to communicate clearly and fully about any new or unplanned medical events. This edict applies to all whether liked or disliked by said parties.
posted by The Big Kahuna at 4:30 PM

It's sure quiet around here

I think I did it!! I actually uploaded a phote without ANY help. My buddies at Microsoft may be calling soon for help.

It is very quiet around here, however, Mark has decided that he does his homework better with the "tunes" playing. He also still wakes up to Brett's music so that we can all hear it. Mark also went teepeeing with Braden, Ben, Scott Porter, Ben Provolt last night after Pine Creeks game against Libery (Pine Creek was ahead the whole game but lost in the end - afterall the end is what counts). He loves being a teenager with a little freedom.

Annalise appeared this morning in the darling "Afton" outfit. She and Matt watched "Shark Boy and Lava Girl" last night (THE dumbest movie in the world) So that is what athey are playing this morning.

John's scout troop "camped out" over here last night. They pretended that the house was invisible and I only say John 3 to 4 times last night getting coat, hat, bathroom, etc. They ar cleaning up some stuff in Sue's yard right now. Dad got home around 11:00, he slept inside and went out this morning (that's his kind of camping).

I am supposed to be updating our books, but this is more fun. What a great Christmas vacation I had. Thanks for being such awesome kids, I love you all!

Mom

You are all so sad!

I am sorry! I have slacked off with the current exciting news of Stephanie! I know all of you were just waiting on the edge of your seats wanting to hear what is going on. Unfortunatley I have no big news to report. I did realize that I was an idiot today though, NO COMMENTS. I asked dad to bring me his old laptop so I could use it for my job... yeah I got a laptop for Christmas last year and totally forgot that I had it. I haven't unpacked it yet. So, uh, sorry dad. Brett, you are going to love this delema. My computer speakers... they don't turn up or down. Yes, I checked the volume on my computer, it's all good. So I have quiet everything! Utah is...well Utah. I miss Rexburg. Scott is weird. But it's fun to hang out with Emili and Jordan, he is so cute. Had lunch with grandma Ouida the other day. See, nothing too interesting. Brett- hows it going? How much weight have you gained now? Don't get girls. They are trouble. Just ask Afton:-) Ok- see you later.

????

ok so thanx fer not even paying attetion to me!! lol well ok so yesterday morning about a MILLION more ppl showed up here all of them are black football playas and WOW i cant understand ANYTHIN!!!!!! i met a few from texas the national champions but ne ways peace out!

UPDATE!

ok so heres the 411 on AZ uh its fun and uh well heres my typical day....... wake up at 6 then leave the house at 615 and it takes me 45 min to get there (it should only take 15 min I HATE TRAFFIC!!!) then i order breakfast and get on the internet bc the garners dont have it yet. then do the work out (the conditioning can be the hardest thing in the world to do!!) then at 10 i am done and order lunch and chill for an hour and a half and go then up the road to meet Chris Houser (WAY KOOL GUY!!) then work out with him and drive home. wait for steve to get home then when he gets home we try and find ways to pick up chicks and well soo far steve and i have not found ANYTHING!! but an idea that we are toying with is..poetry writing and playing the guitar (idk how u spell it) then we go to bed both steve and i at 530 lol not really but close!! On sat we (me, steve, and uncle paul) went to Melody's (family friend and the same family that i stayed with) we helped lay 8 TONS OF CONCRETE!!!! wow!! it was 4 1/2 pallits worth! 80 lb bags EACH!! lol so that was interesting!!

Preventive Medicine

Hear ye! Hear ye! Be it know throughout all Bradyland that from heretoforth, any visitors/guest to the Brady Castle bearing romantic intent must provide medical documents affirming health. A specific, doctor documented and signed, medical/dental health history must be completely filled out including all current and past medications taken (whether natural or man-made approved by the FDA or not) along with any and all medical/dental conditions diagnosed by any health care provider anywhere, anytime. Proof should be provided the King of Bradyland that all conditions and diagnosed ailments have been properly treated and under proper medical supervision. Proof of medical insurance must also be provided in the form of a certified letter with current date by the insurance provider. Government issued IT with photo must be provided. Anyone caught trying to forge documents or falsify information will be immediatel dismissed with no regard to future food or housing considerations.

King, Queen and all children, friends, associates, pets, etc. are held harmless in the unlikely event that something bad happens. Additionally, said guests must be willing to communicate clearly and fully about any new or unplanned medical events. This edict applies to all whether liked or disliked by said parties.

Father's Weekly advice

Children who leave their parents and move far away will be held accountable at judgement day!